Big Dog, No School

“So you're telling me you are not going back to school because you are scared of a dog?”

“Its a big dog, dad”

“But is it bigger than the bullshit lie you are telling me to not got to school? You dumbass!”

“I am not lying. Why do you think I always lie? Like when I told you I don’t like eating 

ice-creams, you said but you just had two tubs of it last wednesday.”

“But you did had two tubs of ice-cream last wednesday!”

“I was different then’

“And you are different now? You are some pollinating flower poop which keeps on changing

 the direction with each breath, with each wisp. Don’t you start pissing with your eyes now?”

“But I am not flower poop and my eyes don’t piss, they..”

“They what?”

“They cry dad”

“I know eyes functions you dummy, but why your eyes functioning up now we are 

just having a conversation”

“But you are name calling me and my tears”

“And these names bother you, why?”

“Like you don’t know. They are mean dad. They are mean words! And they hurt”

“Give me a break, you mean my words are hurting you like, hurting hurting you? This generation

wants everyone to notice their tough stance and recognize their hard hitting liberal thoughts

but in reality if somethings comes their way, They just start looking to borrow as many caps to

hold in there hands and stand with loopy shoulders”

“What's loopy dad?”

“Oh god! Loo...loopy is round bulging inward. You know you are not helping your case.”

“Like your head dad?”

“Helping a case like my head! No idiot”

“No, I mean loopy round bulging like your head.”

“Your mom put you to do this. Right?”

“What?”

“Forget it. So - big dog, no school.”

“Can you shoo him away?”

“What? The dog?”

“Hmmm”

“But your dad is mean why will he do that”

“I don’t know, because he is dad”

“Come you little Mike Tyson, lets “shoo” that dog”

….

“Oh geez! What happened to your dad?”

“Dad went to shoo the big dog.”

“And?”

“And your son is an idiot! Call animal control, we have a leopard roaming in the vicinity. And

please tell me you had an affair and he is not mine!!”